age difference

[LT]

My boyfriend and I are 8 years apart. I'm 25 and he's 33. I never thought I would see myself dating an older guy, but the guys my age just aren't ready for a commited relationship. I always thought I would date someone one or two years older than me. My boyfriend right now is definitely ready for marriage and having a family, which I am ready for too. I love him very much, but I do wonder if our age difference will be a problem. When my parents first met my boyfriend and found out how old he was they were quite shocked.

 

[meme]

It's not that big of a difference. It's not like youre 25 and he's 65. If it's a good and positive relationship and you love each other then don't worry about it. It honestly doesn't sound all that strange to me.

 

[Miller]

a girl I work with who just got engaged is 22 and her fiance is 38, if you love him, that's all that matters.

 

[Hifiman]

8 years is nothing, but since it's on your mind and you're questioning whether or not this will be a problem, I think you are the one having a problem with it. You need to decide if you can overcome this.

 

[istoleahalo]

My parents are 10 years apart and have a great marriage!

My husbands uncle is 20 years older than his aunt and THEY have a great marriage.

My sister in law is 2 years younger than my brother and they are getting a divorce.

Age doesn't matter it's the relationship you have with each other that is most important. Good Luck!!

 

[GB]

Why worry?

The age difference is meaningless except he's proabably more mature and that is a plus. Everyone will get over it in a short amount of time.

 

[SC]

Not a big deal

I don't think that's a big difference, as long as you're both out of school and ready for the same things. It would be different if you were 18 and he were 26 because that's a big difference in maturity and stage of live (working vs. college). However, 25 and 33 are pretty much the same phase of life, and I think it can work well. My parents are 6 years apart and have been married for over 25 years. People will get over the initial shock.

 

[bucki]

Me too

My husband and I are 8 years apart too. My best friend from hight school married a guy 18 yrs older than us. When I went to the wedding, (I'd never met him.) I thought it was sweet that the groom's father was the best man when I saw him at the altar. I had no idea it was the groom.

 

[Giggles]

just married

I'm just married and I am 29, my husband is 37

Not a big deal at all.........

But - I would wonder why you would think it is - if you aren't ready to settle down - don't.

 

[MC.]

This is not a big deal to me. It would be different if you were in different stages in your life or at completely maturity levels. Do you both want the same things? Has it caused problems so far? If you are okay with it, maybe you are just bothered because your parents were so shocked. Ask yourself if it really matters to you.

 

[Eydie]

Eight Years Apart

I was 27 and he was 35 when we married. That was 13 years ago! The age difference has not made a difference!

 

[speeder1]

I am 10 years younger than my hubby. He is 45 and I am 35. What is kinda neat, though.......He was born in 1960, I was born in 1970, and his oldest son was born in 1980. We have been married now for almost 9 years and could not be happier.

I asked him once, when I reach 40 was he going to trade me in for two twenty year olds and his reply was, My body is not wired for a 2-20. I thought that was funny.

 

[musicbug]

Don't worry

If you are happy ,go for it. My hubby is 5 years younger than me. I'm 35 to his 30. You wouln't believe the flack I got. Most people are ok if the guy is older. We've been married for almost 6 years now. I even beat Demi Moore to the punch() .

 

[thiswayup]

no sweat

My husband and I are 8 years apart, married 20 years this June, have three kids, one dog and I just went through college AGAIN! to further my career.
If you're really committed and love each other, it works!

 

[Miss C]

My 2 cents

I'm 25, and I dated a guy last year for a while who was 33. I didn't feel weird about the age thing at all, which kind of surprised me. He had a bald spot and everything! Actually, I really liked him, and it's sad that we had some irreconcilable philosophical differences. Anyway....
On another note, my dad is 10 years older than my mom, and they've been married for almost 31 years. Every now and then, the age thing causes a bit of a snag - mainly because their energy levels aren't exactly the same. But I'm not sure how much of that is age related and how much is personality, etc.
Anyway, hope things work out for you. And I so know what you mean about guys our age! They're into this extended adolescence thing!

 

[cangirl]

Age is just a number, my husband is 49 and I am 38. We do all the same things together, have three kids etc. Don't worry about age difference. It's whether or not he treats you well.

 

[MA Teacher]

I'm tending to disagree

I believe that age is much more than "just a number" as the other posts suggest. With age comes experience and maturity. What a 20 year old might have for interests sometimes changes when that person is 30. As our bodies age so do our focuses in life. I know that I'm much different right now as a 50 something year old than I was in my 30s. You need to anticipate those changes to happen as your partner ages, too.

Maybe it is easier for there to be an age difference if the male is older.

 

[Peggy]

Age

I agree with MA Teacher in the sense that age is more than just a number and that you need to do some thinking about the future. However, having said that, simply the numbers should not keep people apart. My brother and his wife have 5 years difference--her being older than him, but you would not ever find two people better suited than them. Advice they recieved was 'use your head, but follow your heart'.

 

[1teacher]

age

Hi!!! Don't worry about it. My fiance is 35 and I am 23. We get along great and noone has any problems with it (he recently turned 35 and I will be 24 soon). Age is only a number a relationship is what you make it, no matter what the age!!!

 

[MA Teacher]

In response to 1teacher

Once again age is not only a number. You and your fiance are 11 years apart. My questions to you are ...Are you the same person that you were when you were 12 (11 years ago)? Have you changed at all? Have you matured? Have your interests changed? Has your body changed? Do you have more of life's experiences behind you?

Is your fiance different now that he is 35 than when he was 23? Have his interests changed? Does he value different things now? Did the years and life's experiences shape him into the person he is today?

Think about it. Age is not just a number. It's a passage of time and experiences.