Blood pressure through the roof today!

[no name now!]

I have a student who goes to resource for reading, but I have him for everything else. The child is failing everything. He has a poor attitude and is somewhat lazy. The mom and dad have a horrible relationship, she actually left him for someone on the internet, but is back home now.. Mom blames everything on everyone else, of course. In the child's graded paper folder that he returned today, she wrote, "Y'all aren't helping him with anything!" That just made my blood boil. I wrote her back, and I know I was a little snippy! I told her that I was sorry she felt that way, as she "so nicely put it", and went on to explain to her how everything he does or has is reduced, and he gets way more time than he should to finish his work. I said that we were doing everything we could do, short of giving him the answers. I did tell her that I have seen progress this year. He is turning in work more, and is finishing up work a little better, and his behavior is much better. Then I asked her exactly what she wanted me to do. I told her I welcomed any and all suggestions! I told my principal to be ready, cause moma would probably be there in the morning. ! We have had problems with her before, and the school's security guard had to escort her off. I am SO sick of walking on egg shells around parents, especially IGNORANT parents. Wouldn't it be nice if we could just tell them how we really feel! I'm getting better at not just sitting there and smiling, I'm getting right back at them more. I guess after 17 years, I've just had enough. Anyone else feel this way?!?!?

 

[no name 2]

mom

I think her daughter is in my room. Ha-ha!
I just had the same conference, daughter is failing & we aren't do ANYTHING to help her. Daughter was tested has ADD and low cognitive ability. Mom will not allow her to go to our reading, math, or LD tutor. Will not allow her medication for her ADD, will not allow any volunteer parents to work with her, will not allow us to reduce her workload, give her extra time, or read tests aloud to her.
I feel like you after 20 years, I'm just more vocal & don't walk on eggshells. I told her when she decides what she would like us to do to help her daughter to please let us know, since she is tying our hands at every point. AHHH!!!!
I feel really bad for the daughter. She is a quiet sweetheart but just can't keep up with the "regular" classroom pace.

 

[JO3]

Stressed3

I feel exactly the same way. I have been teaching for 11 years and although some parents have been quite wonderful, I have had some that tested the very limits of my patience. I once had a parent who would sneak into the building every morning at the exact moment classes would begin and attempt to conference with me without an appointment. I might have been able to tolerate it if it had been just one time, but when I say everyday I mean EVERY DAY! I went to my administrator and we made the security guard aware of the situation but the parent would sneak in through the school yard every day and every day I found her at my door at 8:30. I was then told to ignore her so that's just what I did. I began teaching my lesson and told her to wait since she didn't have an appointment. She actually walked in during my lesson and began tugging at my shirt (in the middle of my lesson mind you) and insisted that I speak to her on the spot. There was no stopping her short of creating an ugly scence in front of my class (which I refuse to engage in.) One day she actually managed to come upstairs before classes began. She was angry for some reason or another (as she usually was) and began yelling at me. The only other teacher around (hearing this) came to see what was the matter. We managed to get rid of her and proceeded to go into the teacher's room to freshen up before classes. She (the parent) waited outside of the teacher's room for us, listened to our conversation and then proceeded to curse my friend for having said what she said to me in the privacy of the teacher's room. Can you believe that? This parent has been in our school for years and has done nothing but cause stress to every teacher her child has had and I was no exception. By the way, she wasn't even the nuttiest parent I'd ever had. I have stories that will make you cringe. By the way, my school is across the street from a mental institution. Oh joy.

 

[Quatro]

I think she was in my room

My first year I taught I had one who would sit in the dark waiting for me. I must have lost 20yrs off my life for all the times she scared me. I told her I was unable to speak with her after being frightened or I'd totally ignore her. She gave up around February.

 

[pjm]

what you need to do

Hi
you are part of this child's team and the IEP process, if you are seeing that what is currently written in the IEP is NOT working then you as the classroom teacher have the right to reconviene the IEP. Talk to the special ed teacher about how to do this. Even though the child may only qualify for special ed services in language arts, you have documentation (daily grades, test scores) that prove that he needs additional help in other subjects. As a team you can make the decision that he clearly needs more support than you can give him in your regular ed room and that the hours in special ed should be upped. While you are meeting to change his IEP you might want to call in the social worker to help the poor kid sort out his terrible home life. Good luck maybe you can get this all in place before Christmas break and give yourself a little Christmas present so to speak!