Colleagues drunk at staff party

[dkd1173]

Last night DH and I attended a party that everyone on our school staff was invited to. It was at a teacher's home. Let me say I have nothing against drinking and both he and I drank at the party, but only a few. I was really surprised at the number of people who were practically falling down drunk - doing shots, yelling, staggering around, and generally making fools of themselves. Many of them were teachers I would have never guessed in a million years would have acted that way. Our principal was there as well (he was not one of the drunk ones!) I just wouldn't want my boss, or for that matter, colleagues seeing me acting that way, but I've never been a big drinker or understood the concept of drinking so much that you act crazy or get sick. What do you think?

 

[Hifiman]

Been there

Last year I went to my wife's Christmas party. I hate those things, but I knew all of the teachers there. We were at a local steak house. It was the most embarrassing time of my life. Half of the people there were literally yelling at the top of their lungs at each other and carrying on. The place gives you pails of peanuts to eat and you're supposed to throw the shells on the floor. These people were throwing pails full of peanuts at each other during dinner, as well as bread and other food. And most of these people hadn't even had a drink yet. As soon as we finished our meal we left. Just as we did the manager came over to ask people to calm down. I won't be attending this year.

 

[Evergreen]

I'm not tenured, this is my first year. At the holiday party this year, I will have one drink with my dinner and that is all. I want to guarantee that I have a job for next year, and I won't risk it by having a few too many glasses of wine!

 

[Zilly]

Ooohhhh, that's bad

Seriously! I can't imagine people acting like that, but to know that teachers are doing that is really embarrassing.

 

[linny22]

drunken teachers

When I did my student teaching last semester, I realized just how wasted teachers truly get. Some student teachers were even offered to hang out at the bars with their cooperating teachers. It is shocking the low lifes some of the schools hired. All they did on the weekends was get wasted. Sadly enough, they were proud of it and bragged about it at school.

 

[BlueAngel]

staff parties

I have been to staff parties like that as well and when it gets crazy, I just sit there and take it all in. Sometimes it's fun to watch people make fools of themselves. If it gets too far out of control, I leave. Sometimes I wonder if people forget what it's like to be responsible adults. I mean, it's a staff gathering - it's not like we're out with our bar buddies! What I really hate is how later they brag about being drunk and stupid because they think it's so funny. I worked with a lady once who was in her 50's and she was so drunk she was falling all over people.... including into guys' laps. Everyone thought she was just so hilarious. I didn't.

 

[lenarmc]

Very Funny

We had our holiday party last year at my principal's home, and her husband made the drinks. I have never seen so much liquor in a home in all of my life.
I am a teetotaler so none of it appealed to me, but I thought that it was strange for my principal to offer alcohol.

 

[yesteach]

Designated drivers?

The drinking wouldn't concern me as much as the thought of these people driving themselves home! Did they have designated drivers...

 

[SeaGlass]

One time.....

One time I was at a local restaurant on a Friday evening and saw my son's 5th grade teacher drunk out of her mind......she was throwing up in the flower pot near the ladies room. I was so disgusted with her! She had been having dinner with a few friends and had had a few too many marguaritas. I lost all respect for her as his teacher after that. As teachers we have to remember that we are representing our school AT ALL TIMES!!!! You never know who is watching you! Luckily my son was not with me that night!!!!

 

[dkd1173]

Kids were there!

That's part of what I was saying - I forgot to mention that a few staff members' kids were present - on the invite it said "feel free to bring friends or family." I really didn't think that was appropriate behavior with kids around. Even if they weren't there, I just don't think it's professional. Yes, we weren't at school, but the principal was there as well as lots of people I have to work with on a daily basis. I know my opinion of a few people has totally changed.

 

[teachnkids]

partying

It is district policy not to go around town and making a fool of yourself drinking too much. I have seen many a Friday night happy hours get out of control and I know a few teachers have been put on watch. I would never embarrass myself in this town by drinking myself silly!! I will have a drink or two out in public. If I'm at a private party I may have a 3rd drink, but I"m not about to make a fool of myself. It's amazing how little people think of themselves!

 

[SeaGlass]

Our district

Our district has no policy for actions outside the school. Teachers would hit the roof if they knew they were being watched!!!!

 

[Hylin]

I will admit that being a teacher and being in my mid-twenties, I feel entitled to get my party on from time to time. That said, I also have a few close friend at school with whom I have gotten sloppy drunk with. We do these things in the privacy of someone's home though, and it's not discussed at school. I have also had beers with my principal because she and I are good friends outside of school. Additionally, during my student teaching, I used to go out for happy hour with my cooperating teacher.

My personal opinion of "representing my school at all times" is that they pay me from 7:30-4:00. I have excellent students who produce excellent test scores. Whether I get sloshed on the weekend is frankly noone's business unless it's affecting my teaching, which it clearly isn't. When they want to pay me 24 hours a day, I'll act like a teacher 24 hours a day. I'm already mother/father/counceler/nurse/doctor/friend/therapist/teacher etc and don't get paid as much as I should for the hours I do work. There are very few careers who make as little money as we do, but are required to be perfect at all times

 

[new1stteacher]

Hylin

My personal opinion of "representing my school at all times" is that they pay me from 7:30-4:00. I have excellent students who produce excellent test scores. Whether I get sloshed on the weekend is frankly noone's business unless it's affecting my teaching, which it clearly isn't. When they want to pay me 24 hours a day, I'll act like a teacher 24 hours a day. I'm already mother/father/counceler/nurse/doctor/friend/therapist/teacher etc and don't get paid as much as I should for the hours I do work. There are very few careers who make as little money as we do, but are required to be perfect at all times

You go girl!

 

[linda2671]

Role models

If you want a job where you aren't a role model 24/7, get a job doing something where you're not a role model. I mean, nobody cares if waitresses or bar maids go out and get drunk in public. They do, however, tend to judge the whole teaching profession by what they see a few doing in public. Surely you knew before you became a teacher that people would be watching your every move. It's not fair, but it's life.

 

[snapshot]

Not in the "home" district

It's never a good idea to drink in your school district. Even though I agree with some of the thoughts of some of the previous posters about having a life outside of teaching, the reality is you still have to be careful.

Think of it this way, to your students you are a "celebrity." They look up to you (even though they don't always appear to) for examples. If they, or former students, see you sloshed out of your mind in a bar that they might be working at, having dinner at with their family, etc. it will make a negative impression.

Go to someone's home, or outside the district. MAKE SURE TO HAVE A DD!

Party on!

 

[cindyteacher]

I agree with Hylin!

I do not agree with the suggestion that because you get drunk at a social function that you are a "low life". Why is it so hard to accept that people like to drink and have a few laughs with friends/colleagues. Most of my friends are my colleagues and we share drinks every once in a while. While we may "party" on the weekend, we are professionals in front of the students and their families.

As for getting another job where you are not a role model. I believe and have been told that I am an amazing teacher. I work hard at my job and truly enjoy it. I plan for hours and I work hard for, and with the students. I can't imagine finding another career just because I may like to drink and others may think this is wrong. So because I drink on the weekends I have to become a waitress or a bartender? That's ridiculous. How about being a role model on refraining from the judgement of others?

 

[ecteach85]

I used to work at a school where people did this. I went out with a few of them for a couple Friday afterschool bar "meetings". After hearing at school on Monday about the ones who were sloshed that day (I wasn't), I didn't go out with them again. Bad enough that they got that way in public, but to go to school telling about it was worse.

I go bowling with my own kids frequently. Even though we live in another school district, I have seen kids from the school I work at there before. Usually it's during kids' league events. Recently, we were there and I walked into the lounge to smoke. A student from my school was there so I left. Although I smoke, I didn't want him seeing me smoke and thinking it was an ok habit to start!

 

[ubs]

I am no spring chicken, but I totally agree with Hylin. I have been out with co-workers and seen them get really wasted. I have made it a point not to go out with people who will potentially embarrass me. Our principal does not drink with the staff and the staff holds back until she leaves at gatherings. My point is that we have control of who we go out with or which party we attend. There are lots of people out there who act like idiots who are not teachers. To me, this just shows how stressful the job is. If you are uncomfortable, don't attend the parties.

 

[MrChapp]

While some of the stories on this board are shocking, and indeed embarassing to teachers, I agree completely with the posters who have defended their right to enjoy themselves however they see fit in their personal time. Unless they are getting behind the wheel of a car, no one is doing anything illegal. And unless they are coming to school drunk or too hungover to teach, no one is doing anything that interferes with their ability to be good, even excellent, teachers.

My school issued a "morality clause" to our contract a couple years ago. It was very vaguely worded, and lots of us refused to sign it until it was clarified. We made sure it only pertained to illegal activity before we agreed to be held responsible for activities outside of school. I don't feel anything else I do is anyone else's business.

 

[GraceK]

Whenever we have gettogethers with teachers, there are a few who are almost always falling down drunk by the end. Sometimes our principal is there as well. Oftentimes there are kids there (teachers' kids). It bothered me way more at first, I think I was always rather uptight about drinking. Now it doesn't bother me so much.

I am a little torn about the whole "representing the school" thing. I think we should be able to do whatever we want (legal, of course) when we are not at school, however, like it or not, communities often hold teachers to a higher standard. I would not want to see a teacher of my child stripping off clothes and dancing on a tabletop anymore than I want to see our President doing that (lol, I *really* do not want to see him stripping off his clothes!). I am not explaining this very well, but I do think kids look to teachers and we do have a responsibility to behave somewhat reasonably while in the public eye. ITA that behavior outside of school has nothing to do with how well a person can do a teaching job, but I do think it is hard to have the same respect for a person after watching that person do some really questionable things out in public. *However,* at a private house party... anything goes I do not have a problem with insane (legal) things being done, but I do have some issues with *where* it is done sometimes.

 

[SeaGlass]

Ball Game

Our 6th grade staff rented a bus and went to a ball game together....they invited parents too so that they could fill the bus. A couple parents brought their junior high kids along. During the ride and at the game some of the teachers and parents were drunk beyond belief! We had many complaints from parents and townspeople once the word got out! We had requests from parents for their children NOT to have those people as teachers the following year because of the behavior on the bus trip. Its ultimately the teacher's decision on whether or not to overdo it! Our teachers paid the price for that and we are no longer allowed to do those types of things as a staff. The town was in an outrage for many months. The principal and superintendent met with those staff members.....most of the drunk teachers just laughed about the whole thing. They thought it was hilarious and that the parents were wrong to request teachers for that reason.

 

[Large&NCharge]

I have been teaching for 16 years, coaching for a few as well. I have some experiences in my life even as I have settled down considerably since having children and growing up a little.......

I feel this way, each of us has the right under the U.S. Constitution to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Ergo, as long as it is legal, then as an American you have the right to do that which makes you happy. It does not say in the Constitution that we have the right to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness (unless you are a teacher).

I come down on the side of this argument that listen, when I am in school teaching, yeah, I better do a good job and try my utmost best to do what is right by the students I teach.

However, NO ONE had better be telling me how I get to spend my free time away from school. The only time a principal or adminstrator can get involved in my personal business is when I have broken a law and therefore jeopardized my career. If no laws are being broken, then watch what you say to me about how I live my life!

 

[annnonnn]

hung over principal

Our esteemed prince drank way too much after p-t conferences and came to school the next day HUNG OVER! He and his "group" have sex parties and alternate houses. One house has a babysitter for all the kids, another house is where the drinking and sex...usually between the FEMALES occurs.
Yes, I believe it. I see how these people interact at school, I've heard about this from several outraged community members, teachers, and a sane person who refused to participate one night.
I could go on and on, but I am too disgusted!
Would it pay to complain...no, the supt. is buddies w/ the prince

 

[seuss4me]

Don't be too sure!

Of course teachers have the right to do what they want in their own time. Teachers also have the right to reap the consequences for choices that could get them "talked about." I do wonder why getting "sloppy drunk" makes socializing more fun....but that is just me I guess. I would caution, however, that even very close friends OFTEN talk after parties......teachers included. Don't be so sure that partying with friends at a house will be kept private.....so if it "gets out" be prepared to face the consequences.