Dealing with envy

[Unemployed 1]

I returned to the field as a sub -- only to read the names of the teachers employed in the district. Three of the teachers are classmates of mine and have absolutely no business being in front of a class!!! We took our master's classes together and they had so much trouble and yet they got jobs!!! I was so shocked and dismayed and really felt like crap all day and now I don't want to even sub!

I am so down and dealing with the "green envies" and I can't stop feeling sorry for myself. I took me a long time to return to subbing and realizing that there were no jobs anywhere in Illinois. There is a high possibility that I will actually have to sub for them or run into them in the hallways - I am a professional and mature but this really stings!!!

I know that I could go to a different district and start fresh and I have thought about this, too but there is a little voice that says, maybe there are classmates there, too.

I know I probably sound a bit strange - but I'm not!! Today I was really thrown through a loop. My post probably reads like I am a weirdo!

 

[phoebe611]

depressing

How depressing!!! Maybe this could be good for you though. Where I come from, if you don't know someone, you will not get the job. Maybe subbing for them and doing a great job will get your name around to the right people. If nothing else, maybe you could use them as references. I know it's heartbreaking, but just keep in mind that subs are true teachers too!!! Don't sell yourself short. Be the best sub and you will stay very busy.

 

[Not alone...]

I know how you feel...

I too am looking for a teaching job. I am a receptionist right now at a law office. I enjoy my job, but my heart is in teaching. I know how you feel and I feel for you. I subbed last year, didn't get a position. I subbed where I attended K-12, pre-student taught, student taught and subbed...still no job. It is frustrating. I hope things turn around for us as well as all of the other teachers out there who are looking for a classroom of their own. A lot of days I think about subbing again because I miss working with children, but when you sub you feel pain too because you want a classroom. Take care.

 

[Tchr]

I understand where you're coming from...

There are three of my cohort members who just *barely* got by in graduating from the ed program. With a couple of them, their written work was replete with errors of all types. However, apparently they did well in front of a classroom (or well enough...). Now, they all have full-time jobs. I almost graduated with honors, and did have a job last year, but was laid off so am unemployed again. I just don't get it...It is really maddening to think that perhaps I didn't need to to work that hard on my classwork after all, and should have concentrated much more on my classroom lessons??? (Even though my STing evals were excellent!) I am just really confused...I don't know...I guess all districts are different, and none of these teachers work for the one that I did last year. (If they did, I doubt they would have been "up to snuff" for that district, as it is *very* picky about performance...)

It's not really that I begrudge them a job, and I do like all of these people as persons, though, don't get me wrong...but teachers do need to be able to have excellent written communication skills...

Ah well - I guess there just is no justice...

 

[CUTiger]

From what I understand, some of the other teachers have gotten jobs before you and they were not the best students during your master's program. This has created an anxiety that makes you feel uncomfortable, and you feel cheated because maybe they're undeserving of their positions.

Remember that you can't change the situation, so you will have to learn to feel comfortable dealing with it. No matter how you feel on the inside, arming yourself with a warm smile and a positive attitude will help you overcome your fear of what to do when facing the teachers. Other than that, if you can identify key situations when you feel that your anxiety is the highest, you may be able to plan what to do and when to do it. Once you're over your greatest fears, your smallest will seem even smaller.

Good Luck!

 

[Jeane1]

Frustrated

I understand what you are going through!!! I am currently subbing in the El Paso area which is touch and go on available job sites. So, financially I am drained!! I have a bachelor's degree and have gone through certification seminars. It is so upsetting! everyday goes by and I get more and more depressed. Why am I having such a difficult time even getting my foot in the door? My children are asking for things I can not give them.... I just do not want to give up because this is all I have ever wanted to do. I could go back to Property Management after 13 years in the business but why if I have a degree?

 

[techteacher]

Not what you know but...

who you know. This is a lesson that took me a while to learn! I assumed that schools would be knocking on my door when I finished school. I had great grades, excellent student teaching references, etc. Ha, Ha! After a year of subbing and being very aggressive, I landed a job the day before school started. That was 15 years ago...and I'm still growing strong.

 

[Lori B]

Sub Teacher

I too am a sub. I work with autistic kids. When I feel envious, I focus on the needs of the kids. I'm so much better off than the students who are handicapped. This makes me feel grateful for what I have. Lori B