Goodness Gracious

[exasperated]

I have been a PTer for a while and am posting anonymously so that I can VENT!
Parent-teacher conferences. Enough said...right?!? Oh my! I have always been fairly confident with my parent relationships. I have always understood that sometime I have to be "the messenger" and feel like I have been fortunate in even the difficult conferences. Well today, oh my! I had a parent who came in very upset because their child (who is wonderful) had gotten an S- on "paying attention". I had talked with Mom once about it specifically and afterwards just made comments like, "We're working on it, etc." Mom said she was "shocked" (open-mouthed and all) when she saw the report card. Really? Shocked b/c of an S-? What? Do you ever feel like your job would be so much easier if you had no integrity and just told people what they wanted to hear? The conference started off tough and then got no better when I had to discuss a "minor" academic lack. Needless to say, Mom went from unhappy to unhappier. Again, easier to not say anything. I am so irritated right now. Do parents want to hear the truth or just words of affirmation? Grrrrr! It would be so much easier if I was a liar. "Yes. She is doing wonderfully!" "Yes! I see an Ivy League future!" "No...no problems here." "Sure. Brain surgeon." I think I am going to just start filling out report cards at the beginning of the year...for the whole year. It doesn't really matter how they are truly doing. Right? They have already decided what should be on them. Ugh!

 

[Carolyn]

I know exactly what you mean

Thankfully, I don't have to place grades on report cards anymore for behavior and paying attention, but I used to have to do this. I also had a parent like yours who wondered why her child didn't have a perfect score in this area. It's as if a C is a bad grade anymore and an S- is a bad grade. Where did just average go???

 

[lucky]

I can't wait

until my last year of teaching. I'm going to tell it exactly like it is.

• "Your child is an idiot."
• "I can see where your child gets his work ethic."
• "Maybe you should go back to school if you don't understand 3rd grade homework."
• "Oh, please!"
• "Really! You never heard from any other teacher that your child is a bully?"
• "You might want to check her backpack sometime if you're looking for all the notes I've sent to you."

I hope you all realize I'm tired, it's Friday and I'd (probably) never say these things. But I'd want to.
Lucky

 

[exasperated]

Yes!

I love your "last year" comments! I have begun the think that, "Really?" with a face of utter shock should be my standard response to...well to anything.

 

[teachnkids]

Lucky

Too funny and very tempting!!!! It would feel so good! I also like the idea of filling out report card at the beginning of the year. You're right they don't care. I have a student who is FAILING two core classes with me and I can't get the parent to come in and see me!!! Of course her "angel" said that she was going to call because I put his sneakers in the lost and found. I teach 6th grade and he(and several others) are the most unorganized, lazy kids I've ever met. After pleas, upon pleas from me to remember to take all your belongings he left those sneakers in my room for 2 days. My rule is that if it's in my room after dismissal it goes to the lost and found. He was actually lucky, in my opinion, that I had to leave right at dismissal after day 1 and he got an extra day. How his sneakers are more important than grades baffles me, but then again she hasn't called about the sneakers either. I'd welcome the meeting!!

 

[2ndGradeDeb]

Lucky, you made me laugh!!! It is so true!!! Unfortunately, because of the fires, our conferences were postponed until next week!!! I wish they were over!!! I am dreading them!!!

 

[Ontteacher]

Thought you could use a laugh.

Here are some comments I found on a site (don't ask me which one). I'm sure we have all wished we could write comments like these at one point or another. We have to ba able to laugh or we'd never be able to do what we do! Actually, now that I ahve written this, these comments are more appropriate for the parents than they are for the kids!


1. Since my last report, your child has hit rock bottom and has started to dig.

2. I would not allow this student to breed.

3. Your child has delusions of adequacy.

4. Your child is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.

5. Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

6. The student has a "full six-pack" but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.

7. This child has been working with glue too much.

8. When your daughter's IQ reaches 50, she should sell.

9. The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.

10. If this student were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.

11. It's impossible to believe the sperm that created this child beat out 1,000,000 others.

12. The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead

 

[exasperated]

Hilarious

I knew I needed to vent! I am laughing so hard my face hurts! The sperm comment is the best!

 

[2ndGradeDeb]

!!! Ontteacher, I am passing the list on!!! It is hysterical!!!

 

[GraceK]

fun! I had a parent ask if we were shoving English down her childs throat this year. She did not want him at our school, and she was not happy with our program (we are an immersion school), and she did not want English reading/writing shoved down his throat. Fun.

 

[melgirl03]

Definitely appreciated the laugh - those comments are hilarious!!! ...starting to dig - Every year I have students like that - and THOSE are the parents who don't show up for conferences!!

 

[Renea]

How I wish...

I have a dear teacher friend who was at her wits end with a instigating student who managed to cause uproars and cat fights with all of the girls. The girl was plain mean spirited and the mom would come to school in defense of the child. Her little angle could do no wrong. My teacher friend finally said that in her opinion the student’s problem was genetic! Oh how I wish I could say that to parents!

 

[Teach4]

conferences

Thank goodness I've already lived through my conferences and they are now just a memory. For the most part, honestly, a good memory. I had a lot of parens tell me how much their child enjoys having me as a teacher and got tons of positive praise. In fact, I got this from every parent but one. And this parent says that their child is afraid of me. Now, I do feel badly about this, I suppose. But, how in the world could it be that everyone else is enjoying school so much and this one child has the meanest, most intimidating teacher in the school? Do I have split personality and not realize it? What am I even supposed to say when a parent says their child is afraid of me? Well, the fact that I tied him to his chair and openly make fun of him might have something to do with it. Seriously, though, what should my response be?

 

[teachnkids]

Lol!!!

My DD and I were laughing so hard we could hardly read the next one. I love the one about the IQ reaching 50!!

 

[luvnjesus]

Teach4

Now that is just rude of that parent. To be sure, that parent has talked with other parents (seems to be most parents favorite past time) and has realized that her child is in the minority if not completely alone in his/her feelings. This is obviously the student's problem and not yours. As a parent, I would be concerned with my child's misconceptions and not with trying to make a good teacher feel guilty. I don't say this in a hurtful way toward the child but seriously. Those kind of distortions are red flags for future problems. As parents, we should be more concerned with the "true" nature of our child as opposed to re-enforcing "victim" behaviors and mindsets. Ugh!
BTW - Love the report card comments! Absolutely hysterical!

 

[MalibuBarbie]

Conferences were great for me...

...but I'm sure glad they are over!

The day before school started in September one mother came in with her son to meet me. Immediately she told me, right in front of her son, that they heard in the neighborhood that I'm the mean teacher. Oh really? I'm with Teach4--what on earth do you say to something like that? A few weeks before that, I happened to walk up to a garage sale and there is the mother of a little boy who I knew was going to be in my class this year. SHE said, Oh! You're the "fun" teacher! (Now that's more like it!)

The first mom is such a helicopter mom, hovering over her NERDY prudish freaky kid, emailing constantly and writing bizarre notes! (This kid is so going to be beat up in the future!) And wouldn't you know, of all people, SHE FORGOT TO COME TO CONFERENCES! I'm seriously thinking of NOT MAKING the conference up! She doesn't seem too worried about it--so why should I be????

Mal

 

[luvnjesus]

What!

And we wonder why these kids act the way they do. These apples aren't even falling from the trees! You should have said, "And I heard you were the freak-mom."

 

[lovkteaching]

OH my gosh that list was just tooo funny! I loved the digging one and the set low standards and has failed to meet them! Thanks for a great laugh!! I showed my husband but he just didn't get it. I guess you have to be a teacher to appreciate the humor in the list!

 

[connieg]

my dream too...

Everyone will know it is my last year of teaching because I'm going to tell the parents like it is. I will keep that list in my files!
Thanks.

 

[Teach4]

Thanks luvnjesus

That's really what I thought. When it's one child out of a pretty large class, I'm thinking it's his own personal issue. I've been thinking more since I posted, too. This is a kid that I have to redirect a lot. Nothing that's been really negative (yelling, etc., I don't do that) but a look here and there, standing close, asking him quietly to put away the items he is playing with, etc. It probably boils down to him manipulating his parents into thinking that it's all about me and not about his own behavior.

Those report card comments still have me laughing. I, too, am looking forward to my last year of teaching. Even though I know I wouldn't have the courage to say anything even a fraction as bad.

 

[bonnybelle]

Spare Yourself the Trouble

Let the parent fill out the report cards for you.

I think I am going to just start filling out report cards at the beginning of the year...for the whole year. It doesn't really matter how they are truly doing. Right? They have already decided what should be on them. Ugh!

Haaa! It would save you tons of stress and time. It is ridiculous to quivel over an S-. My high drama starts Tuesday @ 7:30 am!