I want to look attractive

[Pawla]

Hi, I feel already old at 26. I don't think I look sexy. I feel short, chubby and don't own nice clothes. My boyfriend likes me but I don't feel good about myself. What should i do? People invest in makeup,clothes, shoes and I get ready to go out in 15 min. Am I out of this world?

 

[iteachtoo]

Maybe...

Maybe try working out. It will help make you feel better about yourself on the inside as well as on the outside. When you're short, you really need to watch your weight.

There is no reason to be feeling badly about yourself. You need to get self-motivated. You need to work on it through exercise, putting on make-up, maybe a new hair style, and finally, investing in some stylish clothing and nice shoes. Take longer than 15 minutes to get ready.
We only have one life, so you might as well live it to the fullest, put time into yourself, and stop wallowing in self-pity. Life is too short.

 

[iteachtoo]

I'm confused...

I'm a bit confused. You posted on "Curly Hair" post (4 posts below) that you go to the hair salon once a week for the "gorgeous" straightening results. That seems pretty high maintanence.

 

[fun_friend]

All women want to look their best.

When you buy clothes, consider more than price or convenience. You can look really great if you spend a little more to get clothes that are of good quality and fit really well. Additionally, the colors should flatter your coloring. I am overweight and all, but I recently bought a new blouse at Belk and got a lot of compliments on this blouse. It is gauzy and flowing. My husband complimented me profusely as well as my friends at work. I look and feel prettier when I wear clothes that fit. Like I said, I have some pounds on me. It's easy to keep pouring yourself in the too-tight pants or not getting anything new because you don't want to invest in too many "fat" clothes since you DO plan to lose weight! Just get a few things that are fitted to the real you. Replace shoes that are showing significant wear too. Paint your toenails.

I just got back from a Mary Kay consultation. I don't think you need to spend a lot of money on cosmetics (cheap ones are effective too), but with these consultants, you can learn a lot about what products are right for your skin so you look and feel your best. You might splurge on a few pricey items to augment your cheap stash. I don't think you need to dress "up" to teach, but you will feel more attractive if you wear nicer clothes and some makeup.

I am not one to invest in a lot of expensive jewelry, but a few nice pieces of costume jewelry will pull your outfits together. I like cubic zirconia and stainless steel earrings. If your CZ pieces are not too large, people will think you are wearing actual diamonds unless they are some kind of jewelry expert!

Get a cute hair style that you can maintain. I'm pretty low maintenance about my hair, but I do feel great looking when I get a new cut! My friends always give me compliments too. While you are at the salon, have them wax your face and shape your eyebrows. I feel pretty chic after this treatment.

You will feel more attractive (and energetic) if you get some exercise too.

 

[Pawla]

"Gorgeous hair"

I do go to the hairdresser but it's only normal I think. I go to a hairdresser who doesn't charge much. In my country it's only normal to go and get your hair done every week or have it nice in place.

 

[SusanTeach]

walk

I don't know why, but walking makes me feel so good about myself. Whenever I'm feeling icky or just unsexy, I always feel better after a good brisk walk. Do you have a good friend (other than your boyfriend, although he might work, too!)? Take them on a clothes shopping spree to find some clothes that work with your body style. A new outfit will also help you feel better. I don't wear a ton of make-up, but a little goes a long way.

 

[GB]

Get clothes conscious!!

Watch TV, look through magazines, spend an afternoon at the mall trying on things that flatter you and fit your personal style. Don't wear anything baggy, dumpy, or that has odd coloring. Get some mix and match items to change it up. Buy a few nice things a season, and add to it with off-season specials for wearing a little bit the rest of this season and having for all of next season. If I buy a hard to match pair of pants, I try to have at least two tops to go with them. Simple jewelry and a nice watch (like one that looks like a bracelet - stay away from a black or brown band) sets off your outfit, too. Also, learn proper etiquette to feel more feminine. Get a couple books at the library. When I started paying attention to etiquette several years ago, I found there was so much I didn't know! In addition to clothes, hair, make-up, persona can say a lot.

I have a friend like you: curly hair, short, and "chubby." But she's a doll! And she does things just like you--15 minutes and out the door. You are just low-maintinence people, and that's okay. I personally wish I could get out the door in 15 minutes, but my whole day goes so much better if I just take the time to properly get ready. Good luck.

 

[JackSparrow]

Guys Point of view

Pawla I think that there are a lot of things you can do to feel more attractive, confident and even sexy. Frankly I'm appalled at how most teachers dress these days. Frumpy, sloppy and unprofessional... hardly a model for the kids we teach. But setting that aside lets focus on your desire to look sexy. I'm not sure what you mean by sexy... sexy by guys standards are your women friends. Let me give you an ordered list from this guys point of view.

1. Smile. Smiling is infectious .. have great eye contact... it can be very flirty and all men like that. When you chat with people feel free to touch there arms and hands... Smiling is free and requires no preparation.

2. Bare your cleavage.. even a hint of breast can be very mysterious and sexy. BBW ladies have a real advantage at this. Choose a nice sweater or unbotton the top button a bit. You could be wearing a cardboard box below but men won't notice due to that cleavage. I have a friend who always gets free drinks and food from the guy waiters at the local TGIF or Chilis if she shows a little more.

3. Wear skirts and heels. No matter your size guys love legs and heels. Choose black ... it's slimming for all figures. If you have a real issue with the heels... choose a shorter skirt.

4. Grow your hair ... at least to the lenght of your chin. I've never known a guy who really like short hair on a woman. I know it's a pain but if you want to look sexy ... hair.

I agree witht he earlier poster that working out can be a huge confidence builder. Fit people have less stress, smile more, clothes fit better etc... but there are things you can do right now to please your guy and turn the eye of other guys and hey... maybe even generate some jealousy from your friends. Good luck.

 

[Pawla]

How to feel more feminine!

Thanks 4 yr ideas they look great. I like the idea of learning proper etiquette to feel more feminine. I'll try to get a couple books. Can you suggest a book please? Thanks

 

[Jack Sparrow]

HotMomsClub Magazine

Pawla... this is on the web and their audience are busy moms who want to look and feel great. My wife uses this advice all the time. Per your request try the following article on the website "From Babe to Baby & Back Again: Seven Real-Life Things You Can Do!"© by Patti Britton, Ph.D. Good luck.

 

[Pawla]

Man I Feel like a Woman!!!

Hi I did follow some advices that you gave me, mainly those suggested by Jack Sparrow. Wow it was a hit. Thanks Jack now I can say Man I Feel like a Woman!!!

 

[Carolyn]

old at 26

I understand what you're saying. It is easy to start feeling old at 26. After all, you've been out of college for a number of years, and the "kids" in college look like babes to you. In addition, you might find yourself comparing yourself to them with their bare midriffs and nearly-bare backsides.

I am an "old" lady, so anybody who is 26 is cute to me. You probably would be, too. Nevertheless, I think you could improve your self-esteem a lot if joined a gym and toned up your body. You're lucky; you haven't developed flab yet (most likely). I didn't start to see things sag until I was about 30. You just need to get rid of a few inches, and some exercises and attention to your diet could help you with that. Join a weight watchers' club. Or, if you don't do that, form a group where you can meet after work and melt away pounds together. Take up tennis. It's fun, and you can lose weight while you do it.

Your boyfriend might actually be thrilled that you are ready in 15 minutes. My husband complains that it takes me too long to get ready to go out. He used to go out and sit in the car and honk the car's horn while I got ready. Fortunately, he has grown up a bit since then. Your boyfriend may actually appreciate that you don't spend a lot of money on clothes. My husband likes to tease me about having too many clothes, as if it's some sort of female affliction.

If your boyfriend didn't like you the way you are, he wouldn't be with you, I'm sure.