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Question for widows

lisa53

Senior Member
I am constantly getting junk mail addressed to my late dh. He passed away four years ago. Some days he gets more mail than I do! Mostly it's Medicare supplemental stuff or someone trying to sell him hearing aids. I've just been tossing the mail, but it makes me sad every time I see something addressed to him. Plus, our post office is so understaffed and our mail service is so bad as a result that I'm starting to think I should do something to get him off these mailing lists. Or would that just be tilting at windmills?
 
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gradymidget

Senior Member
You could contact the various places to take his name off their mailing lists. But I have a feeling you will still get junk mail in his name. My husband has been deceased for several years. I still occasionally receive junk mail in his name but not as often. In regards to it impacting the post office…honestly I don’t think it would make a difference.
 

Linda/OH

Senior Member
I just found this:

I used it because I get my mom's junk mail all the time. I was wondering what to do so hopefully this could help?
 

teachnkids

Senior Member
I’m not sure anything will help, but you can try! My step-dad has been gone 20 years and my mom still gets mail for him. She doesn’t even live where they lived!

Oh and the random phone call asking for him???
 

bellringer

Senior Member
I am sorry that receiving mail for your husband saddens you. Try to use seeing his name as an opportunity to have a quick remembrance of him. Think of a happy memory of your life together.
My husband died 31 years ago, and just last week a piece of mail came addressed to him. But it has been a very long time since that has happened.
 

amiga13

Senior Member
That would upset me. I had a new Trust written and I moved after DH passed away, so maybe that did it, but I’ve never received 1 single piece of mail in his name.
 
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booklady57

Senior Member
I've been getting my dead mother's mail for years now. (She gets more mail than I do!) I tried notifying each company via e-mail as mail came in, but they didn't read or respond to the e-mails generally, and some companies just added my name and address to their files, doubling the amount of mail I get. Have never found a solution. I just toss them in the recycle bin. It isn't painful for me, just a amused reminder of my mom's quirks. She was on every charity's list known to man.
 

School Time

Senior Member
My ex moved out in 1993. I have been getting Medicare supplement info for months in his name. When he moved, we didn't have email yet. But I get email with his name on my email. I have gotten political information from the city he lives in. I have never lived there. From time to time I get phone calls asking for him.

I am sorry you are dealing with this.
 

WIConnie

New Member
Before my father died, all his mail came to me, so even after he died, it was still coming to me. I would open it, and if there was a card for making a donation with an envelope where the postage was already paid, I would write 'deceased' on the donation card, put it back into the envelope, and mail it. It took about six months, but now I seldom get mail for my deceased father.
 

starfish92

Senior Member
My mom passed 30 years and 3 addresses ago. Mail still comes for her and we never lived together except when I was a child. My dad passed 15 years ago and both their mail finds me. I think of it as a hi from them. My husband who did not serve in the military gets things addressed to him as if he was a vet.
 

Ima Teacher

Senior Member
We get ALL the mail around here.
  • DH’s late wife (who never even lived here)
  • my EX (hasn’t lived here since 2008)
  • my dad (passed away in 2009 AND never lived here)
  • my mom (passed away in 2021, but I did have her mail forwarded here after she died)
We have just given up trying to change it and toss it.
 

nucleus

Senior Member
I only get donation things for my DH. I have tried writing deceased on it and sending it back, but they still come. Different address too! I just tell myself it's him saying hi and if they don't even bother to change their records they will not get my donation.

I still get an email for Sybaris (a romantic couples hotel) and I called them to tell them to stop as it used to bother me a lot. It didn't stop. It's been 7 years and now I just delete them. Very frustrating for sure though.
 

Rusty's Mom

Senior Member
Try the writing deceased return to sender suggestion. I worked at a nursing home in the office years ago and we wrote deceased return to sender on certain items. It was mainly junk mail and the secretary sorted it first so we only had unnecessary mail that the families did not need or want.
After a while some names stopped receiving so much mail.
 

TeaPro

Senior Member
I don't even open it, just toss it. I guess I could ask to take him off the list, but it's too sad. I just throw it in the trash and move on.
 
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