Today my girlfriend and I went and had dinner with her sister and her sister's SO, her mom and dad. They've never met my mom.
Now, my mom is nuts. She's difficult and has been difficult with my GF. In what she perceived as being humorous, my GF told a story about my mom to her family. It had to do with medication she takes- and really exemplifies her mental illness. I was mortified!!
I called her out on it at the time, kind of saying "ok, that's enough" and brought it up again at home. She felt her parents didn't think anything of it. My thought is that IF my GF and I are to be together, our "in laws" will know one another. I don't want them to judge my mom before meeting her. (She is friendly and most people don't catch on to how "ill" she is unless they have a close relationship with her- she has a good job, etc. )
I think I can talk about my mom however I want, but my GF can't. She says I'm trying to put on a show. She says I made out "better" when it comes to dealing with the other person's parents. (Hers have their own set of issues but are more normal than mine.) This is just one more problem in a long list we've had recently. We are already in counseling so this will just get added to the list of things to talk about. Happy New year to me. She is now sleeping in the guest room.